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- Anthony Tommasini, The New York Times

Allegory of the Concert Attires: setting and dramatis personae :: 9.27.2009

Setting: Starbucks inside Barnes and Noble, Lincoln Center, 66th St. and Broadway, Manhattan, New York City, NY, USA.


Mr. Embroidered Smock—is THE talk-of-the-town clarinetist, playing Principal with the Latest Chamber Orchestra, and keeping the Asian end up with a solo record contract in Korea.

Mr. White Tyantails—the wildly (but transiently) successful competition winner is just back from 36 concerts of the same romantic violin concerto. His next three seasons are booked, but he's frustrated with his (two) managers at Big Company Artists, who take weeks to return his calls.

Mr. Good Suit—in his large piano studio at University of the Midwest, his DMA diploma hangs on the wall so the ink can dry. He’s in town for a few things here and there, but next up is to play on a lieder concert in Merkin.

Mr. Sweaty Tuxshirt—first picking up mallets for the All-State Youth Orchestra, honing his skills at Good University Music Department, spending summers at Somelake and Othermountain Festivals, Farawayvalley Repertory Orchestra, in Europe with the Festspielorchester Randomstein-Schönebaum... after just one season in his new Symphony job, he’s jaded as the best of them, and still just as fun to drink beer with.

Mr. Corderoy Jacket—wins an ASCAP Award for every 8 minute ensemble piece he churns out. He spends most of his time trying to meld the twisty rhythms and whiny melodies of his favorite band, Waiting for Yesterday, into the strictures of his dogmatically modernist Ivy League training.

Mr. and Mrs. All Black—the hard hitting, smooth talking, Blackberry clicking, iPhone flicking, New York, New Music, power couple. They made the trip from Brooklyn to meet a composer who's a friend of a friend.

Ms. Flowing Gown—is the cellist-turned-hero of her beloved hometown, Smallville, Redstate, especially after she soloed with the Redstate Regional Orchestra at 17 and made it to Juilliard. Sometimes she changes her dress at intermission, because you just can’t play Rachmaninoff Sonata in yellow.

Ms. Colorful Cape—she loves nothing more than to shake her classic proportions and wink her painted eyelids through her favorite coloraturas and arias... but her aspiration, her real aspiration, is to sing art-song. Debussy... ah, Debussy! and yes, of course, Schumann... but if only the tuttis weren't so long! says she.
Ms. Pants Suit—always on time and productive in rehearsals, she is the newest of several violists in the promising but faltering Elitist String Quartet. Admired widely for her sound, she more than compensates for the occasional ambiguous note with luscious vibrato and gutsy body gestures.

Ms. Crossover McLeatherpants—is 50% Irish and 35% Japanese. She writes her own songs, strums chords on the piano, and plays Vivaldi on electrified anything. She's in town for a photo shoot with a wind machine, and you can ask her Nutritionist about what happened to the remaining 15% of her.

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